Hello dear friends, it’s Pey Pey and welcome back to drunk on couture. Today we’re diving headfirst into the watch world which, let’s be honest, is a slightly more intimidating universe than handbags and runway shows. Fashion girls will scream over a croc birkin, but watch men? They’ll physically fight in a parking lot wearing loro Piana summer walks (hot) over stainless steel. It’s terrifying behavior honestly.

But recently there was a collaboration between two of the biggest names in watches that nearly made me drop my Pinot Grigio.

I’m talking about Swatch and Audemars Piguet.

I Almost Slept on the Concrete for a Pocket Watch- AP x Swatch

Now let that sink in for a second.

Audemars Piguet or AP if you want to sound rich and emotionally unavailable is one of the most prestigious watchmakers on the planet. Their watches resell for hundreds of thousands of dollars. You don’t just walk into an AP boutique and casually buy a Royal Oak. Babe, No no no. You need purchase history. You need a relationship with your sales associate. You need to prove you’re worthy. It’s the Birkin of the watch world.

Meanwhile Swatch is the fun, colorful, accessible Swiss watch brand where you can walk into the store with half a functioning frontal lobe and leave with a watch shaped like a jellybean for under $200.

So naturally when these two brands announced a collaboration, the internet collectively lost its damn mind.

Before we get into the actual collab though, let me tell you my own personal trauma surrounding this release.

After working a long Friday shift, exhausted, dehydrated, and starving, I decided to swing by the Swatch store here in Melbourne because I was genuinely debating waiting overnight in line for this thing.

Now listen carefully when I say this:

I hate lines more than I hate screamo music, vajay jay, and men who say crypto is the future.

Yet there I was considering sitting on concrete overnight like a cheap whore for a WATCH.

A watch I did not even fully understand yet.

By the time I got there though? The line was already FOUR BLOCKS long. Four. Entire. Blocks. There was no guarantee anybody near the back would even get one either. Imagine sitting outside overnight, freezing your badussy off, smelling like cigarette smoke and despair, only to be told “sorry babe, sold out.”

Absolutely not.

I’m too pretty for that level of humiliation.

So instead I cut my losses, grabbed Subway, went home, removed my pants immediately upon entering my apartment, and crawled into bed watching TikToks of richer people than me fighting over watches.

Now before we discuss the collab itself, let’s do a little history lesson because drunk on couture occasionally pretends to be educational.

Audemars Piguet was founded in 1875 by two friends Jules Louis Audemars and Edward Piguet. One specialized in watchmaking and engineering while the other handled business and sales. So basically one was the creative genius and the other was the gay friend emailing invoices. And lets be honest they were probably butt buddies.

The brand quickly became known for creating insanely complicated watches. In the late 1800s they revolutionized the industry with minute repeater wristwatches and highly complicated pocket watches. AP basically became the overachiever of Swiss watchmaking.

By the early 1900s they were setting records for thin watches and creating pieces only the wealthiest people on earth could afford. We’re talking old-money Europeans who you probably don’t want to look into there past.

But the real cultural reset came in 1972 with the launch of the Royal Oak.

Now THIS watch changed everything.

At the time luxury watches were almost exclusively gold and dressy. Then AP came out with this sporty stainless steel watch with exposed screws which mde the ultra rich think they looked tough and more raw while sitting by their pool drinking mt gay and making the most hanice, racist, homophobic and misogynistic remarks.

And suddenly everybody wanted one.

The Royal Oak became the blueprint for modern luxury sports watches. It’s timeless, iconic, and screams, I summer in Saint-Tropez and have unresolved cocaine issues.

And honestly? We all still want one.

To this day getting a Royal Oak is nearly impossible unless you either:
A) spend an obscene amount of money building a relationship with the brand,
B) know somebody,
C) sell a kidney on the resale market.

The resale prices are astronomical. Some models go for the price of a small house. Which is crazy because at the end of the day it still just tells time. My iPhone does that too.

Now on the complete opposite side of the luxury spectrum sits Swatch.

Swatch launched in 1983 during what was called the Quartz Crisis, when cheap Japanese quartz watches were basically demolishing the Swiss watch industry. Switzerland was panicking. The watchmakers were stressed. Switzerland was not at peace.

Swatch came in and completely changed the game by making affordable, stylish, Swiss-made quartz watches that were fun and accessible. Bright colors, playful designs, artistic collaborations they made watches feel cool again instead of stuffy.

And honestly? Without Swatch there’s a good chance the Swiss watch industry wouldn’t look the way it does today.

Which is why this collaboration actually makes a weird amount of sense.

Now let’s get into the chaos.

A week before release, the brands started teasing something called Royal Pop. And let me tell you they did an UNREAL job keeping this secret. In this day and age where leaks happen faster than celebrity divorces, nobody truly knew what was coming.

The internet immediately assumed we were getting a Swatch version of the Royal Oak. Basically a colorful affordable AP wristwatch.

People lost their minds. I lost my mind.

AI mockups flooded social media. TikTok exploded. Watch collectors started hyperventilating. Luxury bros were typing in all caps. It was like the apocalypse but for men in Patagonia vests.

Personally? I was excited.

As somebody who currently cannot casually drop $80,000 on a Royal Oak unless American express is accepting delusion as credit checks, the idea of owning something connected to AP for under $500 sounded fabulous.

But the reaction from some luxury collectors was… embarrassing in my extremely educated and esteemed opinion.

Some Royal Oak owners acted like Swatch had personally broken into their homes and spat on them. I saw TikToks of grown men threatening to sell their Aps, or filming themselves throwing out there beautiful time piece because the brand had lost exclusivity.

Babe relax… it is not that serious.

If a colorful Swatch collaboration ruins your enjoyment of a six-figure luxury watch, maybe you never loved the craftsmanship and history to begin with. Maybe you just liked feeling superior to the guy you share an office with.

And that, my friends, is where luxury becomes deeply disgusting.

Then came the plot twist.

A few days before launch it was revealed that this WASN’T a wristwatch collaboration at all.

It was a pocket watch.

And honestly? I love it.

The collaboration paid homage to AP’s history making legendary pocket watches while also referencing Swatch’s quirky 1980s Pop Swatch watches, detachable watches worn on clips and straps.

The collection featured eight vibrant colors with the iconic Royal Oak-inspired dial design. They were playful, weird, and honestly refershing.

Do I think the brands intentionally teased us into believing we’d get a Royal Oak wristwatch? Absolutely.

Do I respect the mind fuck? Also yes.

The watches retailed around the $400-$600 range depending on currency and instantly sold out worldwide. And naturally resale prices exploded.

Now do I regret not camping overnight for one?

Financially yes.

Emotionally? Debatable.

Because apparently some people were out there fighting in lines over these things and I simply refuse to risk getting tackled by a man named Charles in loafers over a pocket watch.

What fascinates me most though is HOW people are styling them. I’ve barely seen anyone actually wear them traditionally. Most people are clipping them onto Birkins as bag charms, which honestly feels incredibly correct.

Like yes.
Turn your collectible Swiss pocket watch into purse jewelry.
That is exactly the kind of unserious luxury behavior I support.

Overall though, I genuinely think this was a fantastic collaboration.

It made AP feel less intimidating, less stiff, less old billionaire who owns a yacht named after his mistress and his wife just thinks it came that way.

And it gave Swatch an elevated sense of craftsmanship and heritage that reminded people they’re more than just colorful mall watches.

It was weird.
It was playful.
It annoyed rich people.
It created chaos online.

Which honestly makes it one of my favorite luxury collaborations in a long time.

But now I want to know your thoughts.

Would you have waited overnight in line for this?

Until next time,
catch you on the flip side.

Xx,
Pey